Let’s get right to it. Do you have the disease to please? Getting a diagnosis is as easy as answering the following 4 questions:
1. Do you say yes when you really want to say no?
2. Do you apologize often? When you are actually not sorry? When you are angry as a way to diffuse and/or end an argument?
3. Do you avoid confrontation at all costs?
4. Do you put everyone else’s needs above your own?
If you answered yes to any of the above questions, you, my dear, have the disease to please.
A simple mindfulness exercise can be just the prescription!
For the next 48 hours, write down every time you commit any of the above actions. What was the scenario? Why did you respond the way you did? This requires you to not only be very aware of your words and actions but honest about your intentions. If you got into an argument, what was the argument, and were you truly sorry for your behavior or did you just want to get the other person off your back? Did someone ask a favor, what was it, and did you agree to do it because you genuinely wanted to or because you feel guilty saying no?
Are you discovering a pattern to your behavior?
When you do a deed out of guilt or avoid a sticky situation even though it needs to be addressed, you are being inauthentic and dishonest. These qualities cannot exist in truly loving relationships. How can anyone authentically love you if they do not authentically know you?
And you definitely deserve to be authentically loved ❤.
To love your life and to bring authentic love into it, you need to live your truth. Curing the Disease to Please is one step in a 6-step formula I created along with yoga psychologist Ashley Turner. Our 3-month group coaching breaks through the BS so you can get clear and confident on hearing and speaking your truth, which leads to more solid relationships in every aspect of your life – family, friends, and work.
Love Love Love
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About the Author
Terri Cole, founder and CEO of Live Fearless and Free, is a licensed psychotherapist, transformation coach, and an expert at turning fear into freedom. She is dedicated to sharing articles with you Bella Beauties that will transform your relationship to fear and therefore allow you to transform your life! Get direct coaching from Terri by leaving a question or comment below and she will personally support you through your journey. To learn more about Terri Cole or to connect with her further, visit her Bella Life profile here.