Peace of mind. You want it? Good news is, you can have it!

I want peace of mind and freedom from my compulsive thinking (for me it manifests as negative body image) so that I can be fully present and experience intimacy and love.  Simple, right? In my heart, I know that its possible. I know I it takes some training and time, but if i am fully intent on having it, I will.

I know I will wake up one day and just not care about how much I weigh. I will be able to walk past a mirror and not obsessively look at my reflection just so that I can suck in just a little bit more or tuck in that flyaway hair.

I used to be the master at flaw detection, and I’m still way too good at it. These past few years, I moved onto sharpen my skills at detecting my rightness, the Buddhist term for perfection. If you asked me three years ago what I loved about myself, the list would have been short. But now I have cultivated a loving relationship with my self and have seen how sharpening this skill of detecting your rightness brings massive gifts into your life, the best being peace of mind.

A few years after awakening to my inherent rightness, I often get frustrated because it feels like I take one step forwards and then two steps backwards. I have days where I wake up knowing that I am perfect and right, right now.  Sure, I want to lose weight and make more money so I can travel more. But I know that there is nothing to be fixed. This is a miracle! And then there are also days where I get knocked down- sometimes after eating too much, sometimes from comments from family members. In those moments when I get knocked down, it’s uncomfortable. I am suddenly unsure that I will ever be able to feel peace of mind, that I will ever be free from my obsessive thinking.  I lean on my support system, my sisters, my coach, inspiring articles on Your Bella Life, to remind me that I am going to be okay and that I just need to keep doing what I’m doing.

For those of you on this journey towards peace, and  who sometimes feel discouraged and unsure that peace is possible for you, I’m here to tell you that it is a sure thing. Not only possible, but a sure thing. And while you are learning to exist in this peaceful paradigm, you are probably going to go back to your old ways at times. Just like when you were learning to walk, you fell down a few times. But no one doubted that you would be a walking rockstar in just a few short months. The same goes for self-love and peace. So remember, keep the belief that you will eventually wake up one day free of your obsession, there’s no doubt you won’t have it.